PODCAST EP:9 “The Guilt of Outgrowing Relationships”

Hey there! Coach Ani here again, and I'm excited to share some thoughts on a topic that has been on my mind lately: relationships. I often receive messages from individuals struggling with their friendships, both within and outside of work. It seems that many are facing challenges where connections become awkward, competitive, or distant. This unfortunate shift is something I've personally experienced, and it's worth exploring together.

In my own journey, I have a close friend who resides in Los Angeles. Our bond is unique, as we maintain constant communication, exchanging thoughts, ideas, and random texts throughout the w h o l e day. What sets this friendship apart is the absence of embarrassment or hesitation when seeking help or clarity. We support each other without any sense of competition.

Building each other up within a friendship is essential. There's no need for competition or trying to outshine one another. When someone constantly feels the urge to outdo their friend or downplay their accomplishments, it often stems from personal insecurities or dissatisfaction with their own progress. These negative feelings can arise when one party lacks confidence or resists stepping out of their comfort zone.

It's important to be mindful of how you feel about yourself when around a specific person. Are you constantly comparing yourself or feeling pressured to keep up? In such cases, it's crucial to evaluate the dynamics of the relationship. Are there snarky remarks or behaviors that contribute to your negative emotions, or is it something within yourself?

Sometimes, miscommunication and unspoken expectations can lead to misunderstandings in friendships. I've encountered situations where two friends approached me separately, each upset by something the other had said. Neither party was willing to compromise, resulting in hurt feelings and misunderstandings. Empathy and understanding can only thrive when both parties are open to listening and communicating honestly.

While personal growth and pushing ourselves are important, projecting our insecurities onto others is not the solution. Instead, it's essential to reflect internally and identify what we need to do to feel fulfilled. Balancing pride in our accomplishments with the awareness that there is always room for improvement allows us to avoid stagnation and resentment.

It's crucial to ensure that the goals we pursue are genuinely our own. Comparing ourselves to others and striving for objectives based on societal expectations or appearances can lead to dissatisfaction. We must align our goals with our authentic desires and values.

If you find yourself following someone on social media or in life who no longer resonates with you or contributes positively to your mental well-being, it's perfectly okay to unfollow or distance yourself. Your mental health should be a priority, and sometimes that means letting go of relationships or influences that no longer serve you.

Nurturing healthy relationships requires embracing growth without competition. True friendships should be built on support, empathy, and the freedom to share both successes and failures. It's essential to evaluate the dynamics of a relationship and determine if there is a healthy balance of collaboration and individual growth. Remember, you have the power to choose who you surround yourself with and the goals you pursue. Prioritize your own well-being and embrace the journey towards personal fulfillment.

So, let's continue to uplift and inspire each other as we navigate through life's adventures together. Take care, and keep growing!

xo, Ani